How to stop dreading the annoying parts of your job (and start loving it all)

I asked a client of mine the other day about his plans for the weekend. He is a small business owner and his face fell as he sighed: “Ugh, I got to do taxes and all the horrid admin stuff for my business. I already hate it.”

It’s true that indeed, some activities are way more fun than others. It would also be fair to say that for most people, the admin work and taxes are pretty squarely sitting in that ‘no fun’ camp.

But is that true? Is processing invoices and doing taxes objectively annoying, horrible, and painful, or have we been simply repeating it to ourselves so often that we created our reality to that image? Do we truly hate it or is our distaste for it only a belief that we perpetuate?

To clarify, it does not matter what the actual activity is. For my client, it’s talking to his accountant, compiling expenses, or sending out invoices. For another person, it would be developing or executing marketing campaigns or attending industry events. And it would be something entirely different for yet another person. What we’re talking about here is that one aspect of the job that isn’t what we like to do, that unnecessary evil we have to get through, so that we can focus on that fun and exciting part of the job we actually do enjoy.

Like anything else, a job is a compilation of smaller activities. Any job can be broken down into separate tasks and processes. For example, for a therapist or a coach, working with the client would be one category (the ‘fun, exciting, want to do this’ camp), while making cold calls or following up on emails would be another, and processing invoices yet another (both likely in the ‘no fun’ camp).

First of all, you want to work smarter, not harder. So if there is any way you can free yourself from the activities you dislike by using AI or templates or other supporting systems, then you absolutely must do that. For some, this could mean hiring a personal assistant or offloading the task of sorting through the emails to a more junior member of the team. For some, this will look like finding the right app. Whatever you do, the goal is to maximize your time doing something only you can do and minimize the time spent on things that can be automated and/ or done by another person or a system. It sounds very simple, yet for about half of my corporate clients this is that very starting point on their path to more freedom and enjoyment of their profession. 

But even after this operational adjustment, there might be parts of the job only you can do and you still don’t like them. One suggestion in that situation might be to simply fake it til you make it. Think Emily Blunt in her role as Meryl Streep’s assistant in Devil Wears Prada. Emily Blunt’s character just repeats to herself over and over her mantra “I love my job, I love my job” as she is battling through terrible flu, crying through her misery. Yet she is showing up every day.

Scientifically speaking, this is not a bad strategy. Instead of ruminating in your discomfort, you simply do what needs to be done. This approach forces you to focus on the task ahead as opposed to examining the unhappy feelings surrounding it. Like the Taylor Swift’s song: I can do it with a broken heart.

People say, oh but Hana, people should acknowledge their feelings and it’s not healthy to push them down. Well, I disagree. Sure, we should acknowledge emotions but if we ONLY listened to our inner voice, we’d be choosing couch and bag of chips and Netflix every time over the run, yoga or vacuuming. Also, pushing down feelings is not the same as breathing through discomfort. You don’t want to file expenses? Well, too bad. It's what makes you an entrepreneur.  

Plus, feeling sorry for ourselves is the biggest waste of time. It takes away our agency and cements us in victimhood – poor me, poor me, now I have to do taxes. Pick a method and do it: give yourself 20 minute block of just grind it out. Then another. And before you know it, you’re halfway done.

Or gamify the process: it can’t be all terrible. What is something that you do enjoy about that dreaded activity? Even if it’s just being done and striking it through on your To-Do list, it’s something to look forward to, right? Then focus on that, and get it done.

And then there is even better way how to fall in love with the annoying bits. Take it all in perspective as a part of the job.  It really landed for me a few years ago when I came across an interview with Michael Keaton. He was talking about auditions and how he used to hate them. The auditions were necessary, sure, but the ‘actual’ acting - being on the set, wearing a costume, stepping on a mark, and playing a character - that, was the job.

Auditions, on the other hand, were awful: one drives for an hour to then sit in a room with fifteen other actors, trying to convince the few people on the panel that you are the best choice. And then driving back through the traffic. It’s not glamorous, it’s not the real acting.

But then one day, Michael Keaton says, one day he realized he had it all wrong. He didn’t have to get the role to be an actor. Having an agent and being invited to the audition meant that he already was an actor. It was ALL part of the job. You don’t become an actor when you are selected for the role, when you ace the audition and get the part. You are an actor when you show up for the audition. That’s the gig. That also is the gig.

Psychologically speaking, what you do makes your identity. James Clear explains this in The Atomic Habits.  He tells the reader: when you get up and go for a run three times a week, congratulations, you are a runner. When you read every day, even if you only read a few pages, but you read regularly, habitually, then you are a reader. Don’t say: I like to run. Say I am a runner. Don’t say I like to read, say you are a reader. Tell it to yourself first. A runner goes for a run regularly. A reader reads every day. An actor goes to auditions. A business owner does taxes.

What’s so great about this approach is that it changes the perspective. My client probably still doesn’t loooove talking to his accountant or filing expense reports but now he can tell himself: "This is the gig. This is me being a business owner. I don’t 'work for the man 9-5'. And I love that. But being a business owner also means that I have to do expense reports and be on top of a lot of things. I built a business. That's who I am. That is my identity, something I created, something I love. I have to keep track of my finances because I am successful and I have too many clients to not have a good system. And those systems need maintenance. That’s the gig.